Getting into a groove, trying to do better for myself AND the people who love me. Wish sometimes that Tracy was less emotionally dependent on me. If I cry it freaks her out if I let out my rage it reverts her to a little girl in front of her asshole father, and I'm not him in any way; I think me repressing so much passion for her sake contributes to my depression and my overeating. Need outlet for anxiety and rage that won't disturb my family, and need to deal with the rage with better spiritual maintenance. Ate very well this week; yogurt or egg breakfasts and snacks. Vegetables and good dinners with no evil periods. Getting better.

I wish that sometimes instead of my loved ones getting upset that I get depressed, and I really feel the therapy I got gave me the coping skills that I will never off myself despite the impulse, I would like to get a pat on the back that I fought so long and so hard and am still here, albeit fat and broken. (and doesn't count now if you do it!:))

I don't feel like my depression is lifting the way it should. Trying to get my shit together but everything is a struggle. Tracy is off this week so will use her company to help me get a better pattern. Ate very healthy today.

Have been eating badly; self-destructive my diabetic feet are dying badly. Can't seem to stop eating late at night, then i wake up ill with blood sugar sky high. I'm a little depressed in general but really making bad choices every day. Starting to be scared of myself-probably a good sign.