Last couple of days have a surreal feel-started secondary ed classes-very vocational compared to my other classes. Having doubts about being a teacher--requires a level of social behavior I've managed to avoid for 25 yrs. Just cold feet I think. Wasn't really organized beforehand and have been struggling to keep one step ahead of the rushing waters of feeling overwhelmed-can't seem to find some of my clothes, for instance!

Have been eating badly, making it all worse in a vain attempt to have comfort food make it feel better. Always shocked to realize how led by my feelings I am when I think of myself as a rational person most of the time!!:)

Going to fast today and force some control in one area and then feel better about the rest and use the weekend to get my shit together! Yeah me!